I have Lost My Way?

Lord why am I feeling like I am.

I have lost my way?

I don’t know which way to go.

I am searching for feelings,

And answers that I know are within my reach.

I just can’t find the words or thoughts.

I need to Jump but which way? I don’t know!

Is it that I feel comfortable with you?

Walking the same paths doing the same old things,

Never reaching out for your hand to guide me?

I know that I catch glimpses of you calling to me;

But I never follow you, am I afraid?

I hold back from you and hesitating,

Am I worthy of you love?

At least this is what I try and tell myself,

I don’t want to know your truth.

Lord why am I feeling like I am.

I have lost my way?

I don’t know which way to go.

I am searching for feelings,

And answers that I know are within my reach.

I just can’t find the words or thoughts.

I need to Jump but which way? I don’t know!

So I pile up my life like a wall piece by piece,

Never letting any one know how I really feel, keeping myself apart.

Except that this wall also stops me from moving forward.

Walking down new paths and experiencing new things.

I pile up my life like a wall piece by piece and build a house.

And pull all that I hold dear to my side to keep them safe.

Am I holding them back too?

No one can get in or out, nothing moving but safe.

So I sit on the floor in my house full of tears waiting for you Lord.

Lord why am I feeling like I am.

I have lost my way?

I don’t know which way to go.

I am searching for feelings,

And answers that I know are within my reach.

I just can’t find the words or thoughts.

I need to Jump but which way? I don’t know!

How my soul just cries to everyone to help me get up off the floor.

When I think about you Lord and how we used to be together;

The paths that we walked and the things that we have done I find
new hope.

I look for you in my despair and you are there calling to me with arms open.

You give me strength to face the world afresh.

I am not holding back now I let you in I open my door to you.

And with new found strength,

I slowly begin to remove the walls that surround me.

And make new paths with you, to walk in your ways.

Lord I had lost my way?

I don’t know which way to go.

I searched for feelings,

And found answers that I know are within my reach.

I found the words and the thoughts.

I needed to Jump and I jumped your way.

And when I realize and look inside myself,

I find that it was me and my pride that has been holding me back.

Pride that doesn’t want to follow your ways

Or to take your gifts that will set me free.

Feelings of no worth that were eating away at me.

I am strengthened and renew my trust in you.

And I start to realize the gifts and riches that you offer,

I am moved to do nothing else but to accept them and walk with you.

Amen.

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